I posted this tweet:

Allow me to elaborate.

In a healthy marriage, more emphasis and focus should be put on the individual’s responsibilities.

In this context, a husband should be thinking more about fulfilling his wife’s rights and a wife should be thinking more about fulfilling her husband’s rights.If both are preoccupied with that, then automatically both rights and responsibilities are fulfilled and no one is being treated unjustly.

But if one or both is thinking way too much about “my rights” and me me me, then that is when problems can start to occur.

The husband’s responsibility is to provide, among other things, and that shouldn’t be dictated by how deep his pockets are. Regardless if he has RM10 or RM10,000, he will still be providing for the family - according to how much he can afford.

Hopefully, when the woman chooses the man who is in this situation, she would understand the kind of lifestyle she is signing up for. Regardless, it is still her right to be financially supported by her husband.

Here's the catch: The term "financially supported" is not black and white.

It depends on what she agrees to and what the man can afford. When the two can be matched and harmonized, the marriage can work beautifully regardless of how big or small the bank accounts are.

The key here to discuss openly and honestly about this, specifically before marriage (during taaruf phase) so that everyone's expectations are clearly laid out on the table and negotiated properly until a win-win outcome is reached.

If a win-win outcome cannot be reached despite trying and trying, maybe the two people aren't meant for each other.

0 comments

Mental Health and Mindfulness Practices

Developing a Healthy Lifestyle

Setting and Achieving Personal Goals

Financial Independence and Planning

Traveling Solo

See all posts from Aiman Azlan | Taaruf Coach